by Dave Noble, City News Editor
ELMHURST – Stating that it’s time to end the protesting, the political debates, and use of the inflammatory term “white privilege”, not-racist Elmhurst residents concluded “All Lives Matter” this week and stated their desire for everything to go back to the way it was before George Floyd was killed by a Minneapolis police officer way back in May.
Over the last five weeks, multiple attempts to expose racism on the local level by Black Lives Matter proponents have been futile as not-racist residents successfully defended the community and the “good people” who live here.
“There’s only like 10 or 15 Black people in Elmhurst, so how can there be a racism problem here?” asked Geneva Ave. resident Glenn Tillman, who also pointed out that protests have been allowed to take place during the COVID-19 pandemic while his daughter was not permitted to have a full graduation ceremony from York High School. “They get to have their protests, but we don’t get a real graduation for our kids. That’s double jeopardy.”
Tensions came to a boil last weekend when a group of not-racist residents held a Blue Lives Matter pro-police rally in front of the Elmhurst Police Station and were met by aggressive counter-protesters armed with masks and megaphones who chanted the unfamiliar names of people who probably don’t live in Elmhurst anyway.
“The gathering had absolutely nothing to do with Black Lives Matter or that guy up in Minnesota who was arrested a bunch of times before the unfortunate incident took place,” said mask-less Kirk St. resident Kurt Minor, who attended the pro-police rally holding a black and white U.S. flag with a single blue stripe and a not-at-all-racist “Police Lives Matter More” sign. “We just wanted to thank our local police department for protecting us from the outsiders who come into this great town and commit crime.”
Other not-racist residents wondered why protests are happening at all.
“I’m getting really tired of these people and their protests. Racism in this country ended almost 60 years ago with the Civil Rights Act and it certainly doesn’t exist in Elmhurst”, said Lawndale Ave. resident Angie Strauss, smoking a lung dart while videotaping counter-protesters taking a knee on the sidewalk of Robert Palmer Drive the next day during yet another protest. “Don’t we celebrate Black people in February? How many more months are we going to give them to talk all this nonsense?”
At press time, the City of Elmhurst was preparing to block off downtown streets and parking garages Saturday morning after four Black people pulled up to Wilder Park and began unloading charcoal, soda cans, and a volleyball net from their vehicle.
The Elmhurst Funion 